vision 4.0

So.

Forty.

Did you know that happened to me?

It did. Last Saturday.

I think I am still processing.

I slept in. Went to a cafe and wrote (new writing project EEEEEK). Then forced children to go to a historical coffee farm open house, at which they had a lot of fun. The day went down hill from there though. Dada took the kids to a birthday party (MOM, the whole CLASS is going to be there. I HAVE TO GO. ....commence sobbing....) I made myself steak and drank a dirty vodka martini, minus the vermouth (so....vodka and olive juice...HAHAHA) and watched Friday Night Lights, episode after episode.

I was a tiny bit put off by how un-special the day felt. Is that selfish of me? I dont know.

But then I realize.

FORTY. IS a big deal.

So, lets celebrate ALL DAMN YEAR.

That is what I intend to do.

Here is what I say.

20s. Discovering who you are. Painfully, very self-absorbedly.

30s. Discovering your place in the world. Putting in your dues. Working your butt off.

40s??? 40s is about DOING SHIT. GETTING IT DONE. Living. Loving. Feeling comfortable in your skin. And looking out into the world, through your kick ass Ray Ban aviators, and saying "HI WORLD. WHAT'S UP?"

I am feeling optimistic.

Clearly. HA.

But I really think this is it.

Forty is standing up in front of a group and casually talking about what you are passionate about (GO GO SOCIAL JUSTICE!) and sitting down and thinking for one fleeting second. Damn, I am good. (Then humbly repenting of pride, of course, due to Midwestern proper upbringing LOL)

But just for that second. You think it.

Yes. I can DO THAT.

Forty, as a mom, is rolling your eyes at your child's meltdown in Target and strolling over to look at sunhats while they put their little selves back together (Okay, fine, I lose my cool a lot too.)

Forty as a mom is putting down your smart phone and playing Uno, even when you feel like crap. Forty is being okay with leaving crabby baby with dada because MAMA NEEDS A NIGHT OUT.

Forty is recognizing that you ARENT going to be a famous XYZ but that's cool, you can still do it anyway, for fun (painting, writing.tennis, etc)

Forty is a poochy stomach (that is where my babies grew!) and not giving a rat's ass about your body in a bikini at the beach.

Forty is wearing what you want. (And being now allowed to embrace Eileen Fisher clothes)

Forty is only one glass of wine, because 6am comes early, and only drinking good wine, because life is too short. Plus crappy wine is full of sulfites and makes your head throb within an hour.

Forty is nursing baby in the Ergo as you browse the kitchen good aisles in Target.

Forty is dinner parties where good food and good conversation play equally important roles. Forty is valuing friendship, treasuring it like a gem. Forty is cutting off toxic relationships, learning the art of boundaries. Forty is letting people be where they are on their own journey, and being okay with that.

Forty is knowing your limits. Forty is knowing your strengths. Forty is knowing you are often your own worst enemy. Forty is staying in on a Friday night and going out on a Wednesday. Forty is saying what you think and having the wisdom to back it up (occasionally.) Forty is also knowing when to keep your mouth shut. Forty is giving advice to younger women, remembering the pain of that stage of life, grateful you made it through, sanity (somewhat) intact. Forty is giving advice and thinking "my gosh, did I just say that??? That's DAMN good advice self!" Forty is knowing there is so much more to learn. Forty is knowing you will never know it all. Forty is giving yourself pep talks. Forty is listening to your 50 year old self. Forty is honoring your 20 year old self.

Forty is golden.

Bring it.

And now, for your entertainment. Here are selections from my pinterest board. Inspiration at 40. Vision 4.0, if you will.