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Tuesday, March 3, 2015

letting Mondays be Mondays

Sometimes. Sometimes you have this Monday, that is so very Monday, its rather cliche. Its like you want to yell out to the universe, oh for PETE'S SAKE, come ON...ridiculous.

I had this day yesterday.

No real reason, oh just a culmination of lots of reasons really...But it's March now, I told myself, that is good. And it's sunny out. Also good.

So why the hell am I lying on the couch feeling so sorry for myself and mad about everything in the whole wide gosh darn world.

My bones ached. No, literally, ached. I have autoimmune attacks on occasion. Like my body is freaking shutting down. Super duper fun and yes, everything ached. I yelled at the kids. No. DON'T SIT ON ME. JUST LEAVE ME ALONE FOR 15 MINUTES SO I CAN BE STILL. I took Tylenol. Aleeve. Turmeric in warm milk. Everything.

And the kids were grumpy and yelling. Missy wanted to do her science experiment kit which involved lots of toxic chemicals and etc. Little man was getting over a 24 hour puke fest, courtesy of germs brought home from Cub Scout camp. Little Green was running around the house pulling books off of shelves.

I wanted to run away.

But what is wrong, said dada? Everything I said. Didn't you know. EVERYTHING.

And then I woke up this morning. It was snowing. Fresh white everywhere. Newness.

And Monday was gone, done with.

And no one woke up puking.

And my bones ached less.

And the sun started shining, brilliantly, after the snow finished, and flakes flew off the trees in the wind, dancing in the sunshine.

And we went outside and played. And little man had a rose to his cheeks again. And the girlies played for hours on their own, happily.

And Monday was gone.

And I realize - perhaps as I grow up a little more each day- how important it is to leave the Mondays behind. Those sucky crappy Mondays that threaten to derail the whole week.

LET THEM GO.

I stood watching the snow whirl in the sun amazed at myself, at this realization, huh, must be a new life skill I think. Nothing has changed, except my perspective. I can just let that day be that day.

Done with.

And now my girl is painting a birdhouse. And I am calmly supervising. And the sun is shining in on a pile, nay, a MOUNTAIN, of dishes awaiting me. And the crappy things from yesterday are still crappy. But, I am impervious. I am resilient.

I am Mommy.

Ha.

I mean this is what we tell ourselves, right?

But, when we can actually do it, let go of the bad days, revel in the sunlight of a beautiful afternoon, blog with a cup of hot tea while the kids play iPad, it IS a victory.

So, claim it. Right?
























Saturday, February 28, 2015

now we are six...little miss version

What?? How could it be??

This girl child, pushed out of my writhing body on a snowy afternoon, six years ago?

With beautiful lips and a faint fuzz of curly golden hair on her head.

And now here she is.

Six.

And we are still so, muchly more so, in love.
































































the first time i saw your little face...

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