Turns out if I waited you may never get another post. Apparently crazy is here to stay.
Woah.
Seriously, I feel like half the mom I was pre-baby.
At first it was a relief to not be pregnant anymore, once the week of terrible tailbone pain was over (that birth was NOT easy on my body!) I can chase kids, do stuff around the house, etc. But that was when someone was around all the time to hold the baby. Once dada went back to work it was like, ummmm, how is this gonna happen?? My girl LOVES to be held. (The new one, that is) I am itching for the days when the sling is easy, right now she just like the wrap.
She is also a fan of the cluster feed.
Nurse. Burp. Poop. Nurse. Burp. Spit. Nurse. Burp. SLEEP. (Ah!)
None of this is condusive to parenting two energetic kids. I seriously need one of those baby pillows that Michelle Duggar wears, you know the TLC reality show lady with all the kids? It straps on over the chest, baby lies on it, and you can nurse and chase kids all at once. HA. Seriously I should buy one. Seriously.
My kids are feeling it too. The big ones that is. Little miss has given up napping, unless dada is home. Little man turns into a screeching banshee several times a day. Our time out step is getting a lot of action. SIGH.
I feel bad for them. The other night he says to little miss, "Mama can't read us books and build us forts anymore you know, cause of the baby, she just cant do the stuff she used to do." And then this afternoon I hear him say to her (after the 100th reminder to PLEASE BE QUIET THE BABY IS SLEEPING) "Why are our parents so grumpy all the time?"
Dude. Maybe if I could just sleep more than two hours in a row.
I dont remember the newborn days being so tough with little miss.
Perhaps I have blocked it out.
Although, it IS easier that the two older ones have each other. And having a five year old who can make bread and butter sandwiches and get out carrots (dinner the other night, HA HA) on his own, is quite useful.
Maybe its me? I did have a part time nanny after baby number two. I definitely don't now.
Maybe I expect more from myself now?
I don't know. I thought I would totally rock the three kid thing. Instead I feel like my little world has been rocked and I dont quite know which end is up anymore.
And its funny all the newborn things you forget. Smelling like someone dumped sour milk on you, mingled with sweat from profuse post-partum sweating. LOVELY. Bleary-eyed diaper changes. Finding poop under your fingernail or on your elbow (how did it get THERE??) three HOURS after changing a diaper. Never eating a hot meal. EVER. Crying over newborn clothes that are already too small. Doing everything one handed - typing, cutting apples, washing dishes.
But then again its the little things too, that are oh so good. How delighted you feel with that first real baby smile. Listening to your big daughter coo at the little one (she talks to her in this funny falsetto voice, "AAAAAWWW. You are SO CUUUUUTE. SO BOOTIFUL! OHH, I WUV you. AWWWW. SO CUTE." And little man with his adorable version of baby talk that sounds rather like a Californian surfer/stoner "Looking good today, not so red in your face! Gonna have some milk, HUH? All riiiiight.") And then the baby soft skin. Sweet little outfits. (Oh shoot, you puked on that one I just changed you into? Time for a new one! Quick, quick, before she weighs 15 lbs - like next week - and outgrows it all!) And that lovely new baby smell. Hmmm.
Huh. Usually I can talk myself into feeling more capable in these blog posts. Not working so much this time. Mainly I am just doing the day to day thing I guess. Trying to make it work. Trying to do the best I can. Hopefully by this time next month things will be easier? More restful? More peaceful? Maybe not?
Time for more coffee I think.
Some pictures of our week.......for grandmas, aunties and etc.
sisters |
first bath - with eager "helpers" |
comparing baby pictures, little miss and little man |
first car ride |
first sling |
farmers market! |
big fan of the moby wrap |
attempting a family picture |
well, Sweetie, You got thru that birth, you can get thru anything! Yes, it does get easier and easier and one day you'll ask yourself " where did my babies go?" Much love, Grma B.
ReplyDeleteI am sure it will get easier as things settle down. WIshing you some sleep!
ReplyDeleteBeen there!
ReplyDeleteYou WILL get through this and someday laugh.
My toughest transition, I think was when number three was born. I looked at my kids and thought, "When is your real mother coming to look after you?" :-)
When the fourth one was born I was thinking, "Oh my word! What am I going to do?" And you know what? It was a BREEZE! I'm tellin' ya, after the third one, it gets so much easier. :-)
And hey, TAKE IT EASY! You are still technically "Lying-In" right?!