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Monday, April 1, 2013

anti-recipe #59 super lemony lemon bars

Well, I am gonna say this is an anti-recipe but really its me demonstrating my anti-cooking skills.

Dont you hate it when you are following a recipe, like trying to do it in half or something, and you forget to half ONE ingredient??

This is a prime example of why cooking-by-recipes and I dont get along.

I am making our Seder dinner for our Passover meal right now, just me, myself, and I, in the kitchen, chopping up the charoset (apples, walnuts, cinnamon, sugar, and a dash of white wine), making a lemon dessert, with the brisket roasting deliciously in the oven (this is my college friends recipe and it is SCRUMMY. It also involves brandy, which I was like, huh, that smells good, maybe I will have a sip, or two....AH HA! Or as little man said the other day, LIGHT BULB! That might explain my problems with recipes right now, HA HA HA)

Dada is on a spring break, outside in the garage, doing dada things. You know, with tools and such.

The kids are downstairs watching the Wizard of Oz.

Baby dear is taking the longest nap ever.

And so, I cook. Or attempt to.

I found several great websites, again from my friend, and have been reading about traditional Seder meals. I went to the store, attempting to secure everything, but alas, no matzah! (Or as the sales clerk in our very non-Jewish little town said, "matzah? huh, I think all that WEIRD stuff is in aisle 12." Well then. Next year, we make our own.) So, some flatbread will have to suffice.

And then I figured well, this is not at all Kosher, so I will make super lemony lemon bars, because they are yummy, and springy, and well I am going to attempt no sugar for a bit in the next month or two last hurrah, right??

But oh, these bars are so good. I am following the basic recipe I found online, touted as Ina Garten's recipe. Its been years since I have made these but I used to all the time, like to go to church potlucks or as a teenager, having friends over for tea (yes, we used to do that, as long blonde-haired beach-going California teenagers, HA.)

Anyway. Here is how I did it.

Take a stick of soft butter, mix with 1/2 cup sugar. Add one cup flour, dash of salt. Press into a buttered 9x9 pan, refrigerate for awhile. Then bake the crust for 10-15 minutes at 350. Take out, let the crust cool.

Now mix 3 eggs with a cup and a half of sugar. Shred in some lemon zest, add 1/2 cup of lemon juice and half cup of flour. Mix. Here is where I messed up. I added a CUP of flour. Crap. So I made the full amount of filling. Oh well. Thicker bars.

So I'm reading this through and I am like, this doesnt look like that bad of cooking skills. Except, oh, instead of measuring things properly I dump and scoop and I am like, oh, the cup measurer is dirty, this plastic cup looks about the right size, eh, that works. Do you cook like this too? And then, the recipe said a full 2 TABLESPOONS of lemon zest. That is a lot of zesting. I dont do that much zesting. Plus, I am not crazy about the little bits of zesty in my bars. So, less zest. This is but an example. You see my point though. This is lazy cooking, right? Oh well. We ALL know I am lazy. HA.

Oh, I nearly forgot, when the bars are cooling sprinkle with powdered sugar. Most important.

In any case.


And they just came out of the oven, and I tasted one, you know, just to be sure it is edible (VERY important). OHMYHEAVENS. Delicious.

this is my attempt at an artsy food picture.

Eat, drink and BE MERRY. Chag Sameach!


  1. looks yummy! I cook exactly like you- I just wing it and eyeball things. It usually works, but the things I make don't always taste the same. oh well!

  2. I cook like you... so I really to go on a raw diet! more simple! ^^


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