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Wednesday, May 16, 2012

he loves me, he loves me not

Sibling relations are a fascinating thing.

Such fierce loyalty.

Such fierce animosity.

Such anger.

Such tender love.

As my kiddos get older its amazing to watch it unfold.

Amazing/infuriating at times.

Lately there have been screaming fits at our house. Brother is playing with baby toy (side note: why do big kids LOVE baby toys and babies LOVE the big kid toys??) the same toy little miss was playing with two minutes ago. She comes up to him and demands, in no uncertain terms, that he quickly and readily relinquish said toy. (Can you tell I worked with lots of lawyers in a previous life?? HA) He refuses.

This is where the blood curdling screams ensue. Lots and lots of screaming. Little miss is amazing at screaming. Really. I bet our neighbors particularly love this new trend. Especially when it occurs at 8am. (I know I LOVE it.)
guess what we were screaming about two minutes later??

I drag one kid off the toy (they are laying on it, dog pile style at this point) and banish them to the "Time out stairs" the other gets sent to the couch.\

When I was little my mom used to put us in the bathroom together for five minutes. I can remember the little egg timer being set, the door being closed. Oh the fighting we sisters used to do! The scratching! The hair pulling! The karate chops to the neck! (That would be me, trying to imitate the Karate Kid, sorry Anne!)

Now, my latest end to their three minutes of silence, to hold hands, look into each others eyes and say one nice thing about each other (which usually leads to giggling) and then hug and say I am sorry. Then we arent allowed to talk about the grievance again.

By the time this whole process is over they have entirely forgotten (mostly) the fight and go off happily together.

And yet, and yet, when the whole family is talking in the chaos of dinner time or something and little miss is begging for attention "Mama, mama! I said MAMA!" Brother comes to her side, "Umm, excuse me mom, she wants to say something." And she comes to his defense when he is in trouble. "Don't get mad at my big buver! (one of those mispronunciations I cant bear to correct..) He is my buver and I LOVE him."

And then, late at night, when little miss has napped and cant get to sleep, she snuggles up to him, kisses his head ever so gently, and says, "I love you so much" quietly in his ear.

And together they snuggle into each other in our bed at night, until we carry big man off to his own bed.

Now adding baby into the mix a whole new level unfolds. She has now learned to clap and they are THRILLED with this new skill. "Do it again! Do it again! Look mom, she is DOING IT!" And baby comes crawling across the floor whining to be held and little miss comes to me, "Baby is crying for you mama! She wants you! Get her!" And when I pick her up little miss says, but I want her to play with me! And little man greets her in the morning with "Hello missy! Hello head! Hello misssy poochie head!" (Dont ask me...)

And in it all tts amazing how in tune with each other they are. They know each others moods. Needs. Likes. And even though some people think we are hermits, I credit our at-home-ness lifestyle with this, in a lot of ways. There are no "us against them" sibling/friend rivalries. I am sure that will come, in time, but for now they can play together, fight together, and become little people together.

And I am loving it.


  1. I'm watching my grand-daughters and noticing these same things. I can watch from one level removed because as mom I was concerned that they behave correctly - especially in public - but as Oma (grandma) I can chuckle at things that may have been mortifying to me long ago.

    Maggie, who will be 3 in June, is very protective of her little sister and cousins. Someone was at our house and she thought they were chewing her sister out and she got in between them with her hand extended towards Ella as if saying, "Stay back, I've got this." Just minutes earlier she had sat on her sister in anger.

    I've seen her do this protecting new little baby Ayla. She sat on a stool at Ayla's head while baby was in a little moveable bed. Anyone who came near the little bed was treated to Maggie standing up and sort of getting in their way. At first I thought it was "hogging the baby" but later I realized she's got a fierce protective streak....except when she's trying to see what the effects of a screwdriver will be when stabbed towards her sister. Ha ha!

    I love how you observe things with a cool perspective, Sara.


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